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Legal Guidance

Is there a right way to tell your kid about divorce?

On Behalf of | Aug 7, 2020 | divorce |

Illinois parents have a lot of steps to take when getting a divorce.  There is an emotional and mental health toll besides the legalities. And, on top of all of that, your child’s mental health may be affected as well.

The first hurdle is telling your children.

How will your child react?

According to Psychology Today, any tip you receive should be adjusted to suit your own child. Breaking news of divorce is a personal experience. Every child will handle it in a different way. You know your own child best. Do they need to have things explained in a straightforward way, no frills? Would they react better if you lead into it carefully? Do they need emotional reassurance more than logical reassurance? Take their personality, maturity level and age into consideration.

Knowing what information to give

But whatever their age is, there are some things that apply to every child. For one, your children do not need to know the intricate details of your divorce. Talk to your co-parent ahead of time and decide what information you will leave out. Some information is imperative to share, though. For example, tell your kids who is moving out. Address the plan that, hopefully, mutually you have reached. Let the children know they will be involved and see both of you.

Second, do not expect too much maturity and understanding. This is earth-shattering news. Even if your child is sharp, they may need help understanding this change. Make sure it is very clear that you do not blame them for it, too. Children of divorce often feel immense guilt. You want to nip this in the bud.